If Monkeys had little dwarves that could act as sidekicks and were proficient in carpentry and joinery…….

Here is an extract (i say extract, its actually the whole thing, but that makes it sound all important and academic) of a email i sent to one of my friends who managed to pique my angerbone and spark a very valid source of discussion.

I have reprinted it here as an open letter and for no reason i have no spaces and lots of little sideways chevrons just to hurt your eyes……..

A Letter to the Blind…..

I’m in a (surprise surprise) pompous and very angry mood this evening>>a recent occurence has made me ponder a very interesting (well to me anyway)>ponderance…..hmmm…….how to put it…..that is the real>question…….lets try this….>>music is a universal, unilateral, metaphysical, physical, emotional, art>form. one that crosses most boundaries of time/space etc as it provides for>the avid listener an intake of information or data for each individual to do>with or use as they wish(sorry to condense it down to that guys, but it>serves a purpose).>>if this is the case is it possible to truly define what stands as being>”open-minded”? I have always thought of myself as fairly open-minded when it>comes to music (pretty much the ONLY thing i am open-minded about), its the>intolerance that i suffer from, now sometimes all it takes is someone to>point out that for all your ‘principles’ on a certain subject, it is almost>impossible to be 100% subjective, as any art form fundamentally comes down>to personal opinion and experience. (eg i’m not proud that i have been>present at a stereophonics gig, but the fact that i had such a shit time,>and that it confirmed my opinions of them was as defining as seeing a gig>that is amazing). these experiences are what form our opinions through>negative or positive outcomes and judgements made in hindsight.>>therefore is it possible to be truly “open-minded” when you have come to the>conclusion that something is “absolute cunty shit”? surely that is a>fundamental contradiction? obviously it is impossible to like everything>thats out there.>>i have found over the last few years that my brand of open-mindedness (or>pig-headedness as others may call it, which i think is an attitude where i>will give anything a listen but, am free to form my own opinion on it, and>voice it) is something that people do not appreciate. it is very easy to>claim that the music you listen to is the only ‘cool’ kind of music, or that>its the best, or the most original….but it must also be accepted that it>has only reached that status, because it has been defined by the criteria>that you as an individual have created and developed over time. i have>always tried to be aware of this, as it is sycophancy and the desire to be>’cool’ that destroys and undermines what i truly believe should drive music.>>My question is this:>>If music is judged and pre-judged (come on, we ALL do it) based on>completely individual criteria (which obviously sometimes can be shared,>hence our love of all things filth), criteria which are unique to the>individual, is it possible to be genuinely open to all things musical?>>to put into context,>>some people use their music as an escape,as a blanket to wrap around>themselves, where the empathy they hold with the songs, and the past>experiences they associate with them provides sanctuary from the unfamiliar>and scary nature of anything ‘new’. as a result this leads to a quest to>hear similar-sounding music, music that holds the same aesthetic qualities>as the stuff they’ve heard before. almost a metaphysical tried-and-tested>approach. very insular and inwardly focused, but perfectly valid nonetheless>>(at this point i will apologise as i’m sure you are both thinking ‘what a>cunt this boy is’, but i apologise for nothing, my blood has been boiled,>and my back been put up, and this is the only way for me to vent these>feelings)>>>….and there are also people that use their music to the same ends, for>safety, sanctuary etc, but do it through the experience of as much musical>fodder as possible. the music is consumed on a massive scale, in this case>an outwardly focused quest, an attempt to find and locate music that doesn’t>necessarily hold the same musical values or sounds but shares an underlying>ethos, behind the music. the artists reasons, and principles for producing>the music are the same but the actual output is very different. here i will>cite a very personal example, as many modern electronic artist’s attempts to>detach themselves from society can be compared to the anti-society>’outcast/underdog’ stance that has spawned the grunge/sludge/stoner rock>movement. the principle is the same but to compare ‘blue monday’ (By New Order) and ‘the>day i tried to live’ (By Soundgarden)would be laughed at in many circles.>>Is either one correct or incorrect? can our musical choices be defined in>this simplistic way? or are our attitudes an amalgamation of several>different versions of this.>>something for you to think about, please include me in any replies, as an>e-mail to each other with the subject: ‘** is such a cunt’ will pretty much>prove the theory i am working on.>>maybe all of the above is bollocks, and we shouldn’t question why we like>what we like. but i am trying to establish for my own peace of mind why we>DON’T like what we DON’T like.>>sometimes even a person you consider to be truly open to new>things/originality/ethics/inventiveness in music can prove you wrong with a>slip of the tongue. i’m no angel when it comes to music, but if i don’t like>something i’ll tell ya, and in fact in both of your cases i’m pretty sure>that at some point…..i have.>>yours self-righteously>>**** *********(esq)>>>>>P.S. despite all the above the Stone Roses can suck my big, hairless,>purple, nobbly fat one. bunch of fucking idiotic cunts. and that goes for>ian browns solo stuff too. he’s amusing to look at but thats where the fun>ends. pricks.

For all of you that made it to here….you probably have a headache……